As I sit here looking at these two beautiful Laurelhurst and Lompoc pints of beer, I harken back to the days of my first microbrew. It was a delicious Black Butte Porter on the day after my first Fall term final. My friend advised me about the taste and how it would change my life forever. Sipping each chocolaty/soy-saucy drop led me down the road of dark, thick beer. This single moment made me realize that I could never go back to drinking crappy PBR. Of course, beer pong would change all that, but my mind was now open to the idea of paying $8/six pack of beer.
Now that I saw the big picture through the bottom of a microbrew glass, I wanted to taste more… I needed to taste more. Brew fests, Blues Fests, Easter Beer hunts, brewery tours, even at one point I tried to brew my own stout (It tasted like mud water). Throughout these micro-adventures I would be introduced to a group of people that deserve their own classification.
Beer snobs are much like your Portland hippie. They live to be free from the social norms established by society. Five shirts, three cargo shorts/pants and Keen footwear is all they need for their wardrobe. No matter the environment, their thick husky beards will protect them from any weather. Although most of them are large bears, some have taken a liking to outdoor sports. Their motto: “Dead Guy is always served best after a hike on Dog Mountain”.
However, NEVER confuse the beer snob with a wine snob. Unlike wine snobs, who are usually rich and affluent, beer snobs thrive on having a unique taste unlike any other human on this planet. One could be an executive of an interactive agency in town. Another could be a Hood River ski bum. No matter what their background, they will forever argue about which organic beer is better. So what’s the only thing they can agree on? Light beer was created by women, for men.
Since BBP first hit my lips, I’m proud to say I love microbrews. I’m pretty sure I’ve been to more microbreweries west of the Mississippi than 75% of the American population. But most days, I couldn’t even imagine drinking a Blackfoot Bitter. All I want is a cool, cold refreshing Coors Light on my front porch. So to you Mr. Beer Snob, I could care less that I’m drinking a wussies beer. I may not share your unique taste, but at least I don’t share your smell.